Why Do We Save Our Biggest Words of Encouragement for Funerals?

Our words are far more powerful an we could ever imagine.  We know that when it comes to other's words towards us, but we forget it when it comes to our words towards others.  Other's words have shaped our lives.

How are you using your words to shape the lives of those around you?

These are my notes from the 2nd half of the first session from the Orange Tour in Austin.  Jeff Henderson gave the presentation.  These are not my thoughts or ideas.  These are quotes and paraphrases from my notes of his presentation.  They're written more first person for the sake of readability.

Words over time shape a person's life!

Your words matter!   Every person in the room has a story which affirms this.  Whether good words or bad words, you can tell story about how someone else's words changed how you view yourself.  Or maybe it's not their words, it's their lack of words.  We have been shaped by words over time.


Since we all acknowledge the incredible power of other people's words on our lives, we need to leverage our words for the benefit of others.


What if there was a simple (though not easy) way to transform the lives of the people around us? What if we could change our family dynamic? What if could change work environment?   What if it was as simple as a single word?  What would that word be?

ENCOURAGEMENT!

The Gottman Research group has found that most people receive 7 criticisms for every 1 compliment.

This explains why so many work places, marriages, churches, and friendships are in desperate trouble!  Most people are starving for affirmation.  We live in a world where people are suffocating from self doubt.  We're all insecure about something.  Maybe you're here to help some move forward.

We must change the ratio!

Every moment throughout the day is an opportunity to encourage people!  Every stop at the gas station.  Every fast food worker.  Every conversation at work.  You can be an encourager and change the ratio!

You can make little drops of encouragement throughout the day!  So often the church is known for their drops of judgement and criticism.  We should be known for our encouragement.

A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. - Proverbs 11:25

The reality is that, when we encourage other people, it actually refreshes our own soul.  We are one of the beneficiaries.  Focusing on the positive in other feeds our own souls.

Sadly, too often in life we take those closest to us for granted.  Consider the people around you

THREE CIRCLES

1 - Your Inner Circle

These are the people closest to you.  Your family and best friends.  So often, we take them for granted.  We're far too comfortable being critical, and far too slow to praise.

2- Your Circle of Influence

These are your co-workers, volunteers, and acquaintances. You see them everyday and interact with them. You have influence on each others' lives.

Often, we are slow to directly criticize the individuals, and quick to praise.  While that isn't a bad thing, it's strange we don't do the same for our inner circle.

3 - Your Daily Life Circle

These are the people we encounter in everyday life.  The waiter at Chilli's.  The bank clerk. The teenager at Chik-Fil-A.  So often, we don't treat these people like real people.  They serve a role, but they aren't a "person."

All of these people need daily drops of encouragement.  They are all suffocating for encouragement.  You have absolutely no idea how powerful a drop of encouragement can be.

The Place of Greatest Encouragement

Here's the saddest news of all.  There is a place where individuals always receive incredible amounts of encouragement. There is a place where people finally say what they've always been thinking....FUNERALS!

Why do we save our words of encouragement for when it's too late?
Why do we save our words of life until after death?

Who do you need to go and encourage?
What can you do today to change the ratio of encouragement in someone's life?

The international sign that someone needs encouragement is that they're breathing! 

PERSONAL CHALLENGE

What can you do this week to encourage the people in your inner circle?

What can you do this week to encourage the people in your circle of influence?

What can you do this week to encourage the people in your life circle?

Try writing a letter each week to the people in your inner circle.  It doesn't have to be long.  Just make it personal!